The Importance of Self Esteem

Millions of Americans suffer from low self esteem, and you may find it difficult to get out of your rut for a number of reasons. The biggest factor in self esteem comes from our youth experiences, whether positive or negative. For many people, self esteem can be achieved by simply reading a self-help book or starting a new hobby. However, others may have already fallen to depression, gang involvement, substance abuse, obesity, or illness and may need to complete a specialized treatment program to strengthen their confidence and find meaning in life.

Self esteem is defined as “Confidence and satisfaction in oneself.” While it may sound personal in nature, self esteem (or lack thereof) really underlies everything we do in life and how our relationships with others develop too.

• Low self esteem strips us of our self confidence and when we think little of ourselves, we feel we do not deserve to be happy or successful. We feel unworthy of love.
• Positive self esteem increases confidence and happiness, while improving the overall quality of our lives. We are comfortable in our own skin and treat others without any illusions, jealousies, hang-ups or insecurities.

So what’s the foundation for a positive self image and good self esteem? It’s about believing in yourself and knowing that you are unique, special, and designed for a purpose in your life and others. It’s about being the best person you can be and giving 100% in everything you do.

Here are a few ways to begin building your self esteem today:

1. Help others. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, help an elderly person grocery shop, hold the door for someone, instruct your child on a difficult homework assignment, or listen to someone in need of advice and offer your expertise.
2. Develop a talent or start a new hobby. Perhaps you’ve always wanted to learn to ski, paint, play guitar, ride a horse, or dance the salsa. Taking courses may awaken your passion and esteem.
3. Get a makeover. As we get older, we may become more slovenly about our appearance – whether we’ve already found someone who loves us unconditionally, we’ve lost a spouse, or we’ve just given up hope. Start looking good – not for others – but for YOU. Buy a new outfit, get a new haircut, change your hair color, go to the spa for a relaxing day, get a new pair of glasses, or buy a new accessory. If you’re not sure which direction to take, meet with a professional fashion consultant to gain exposure to new possibilities.
4. Reflect. Sometimes it’s a matter of ‘fessing up. Write down skills, talents and pursuits that you have. Ponder over awards you’ve won, compliments you’ve received, or good grades you got in school. Truly you have talents that no one else has. Not everyone can be a professional athlete, but perhaps you have a general proficiency in many different sports and that makes you special. Maybe you’re not the best at your job, but you bring a smile to your coworkers’ faces or provide inspiration that motivates others.
5. Push yourself outside your comfort zone. Do you fear public speaking? Are you terrified of walking up to a stranger and introducing yourself? Are you paralyzed by a fear of crowded elevators? Does the idea of being caught in public without makeup or without having shaved terrify you? Do something that you’ve been afraid of doing – not just once, but several times. Eventually, you will realize you can and will survive the experience – and you’ve come out stronger.

Remember, we cannot pick and choose what happens to us in life. We can only adjust our expectations and our attitudes.

Best,

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